It was one of those moments where I was instantly glad I had thought things through. I knew in advance there might be a chance that someone would say something nasty, negative, or in this case just plain stupid. I have found if you can prepare in advance for it, the actual is never as bad as the imagined. And so, when I read a comment on an article I had published in the Globe and Mail that basically indicated that the only reason I had quit my corporate life was because a sugar daddy was paying my way, three things happened, in quick succession, over a matter of seconds – and then I was over it.
The first thing that happened was that I had a gut reaction to be hurt that anyone could think anything negative about my positive intentioned article. Two seconds later I became angry that someone who doesn’t know me would put out to the world a comment that doesn’t represent me and my truth – and really goes against all logic when you read the article. For a moment I was tempted to respond to the comment with something equally ridiculous – but refused to sink to his level. And finally, three seconds after that, I remembered that his comment wasn’t my truth. It had nothing to do with me and my truth, and once that realization hit, I felt incredible peace and a little bit sorry for the guy that he goes through life thinking negative thoughts about people he doesn’t even know – what does that say to how he feels about himself.
“But, Christy, you’re writing about it now, are you sure you’re over it?” You might ask. I am writing about it to prove my point, and because I think it’s kinda funny. I mean, I wish I had a sugar daddy paying my way, but the only one paying the bills in this house is me – unfortunately Sophie, the chocolate lab hasn’t found a paying gig yet.
In a Mind Set #GrowthZone first, I have filmed a short video on the three steps that will help you to know your truth and conquer your naysayers. And in the mean time, I’ve been taking applications for sugar daddies for the guy who made the comment – I feel like he could use a little sugar in his life, might make him a bit sweeter.
So there you have it. Three easy steps to help remind yourself that when someone says something that might hold you back from taking action, even if that someone is the voice in your head, ask yourself these three questions:
- What is my motivation?
- Why is this important to me? How does it align with my values?
- Who else benefits? (And it’s ok if it’s only me).
As an aside, stepping out of your comfort zone is going to open you up for negative reactions – that’s a reality. However, it also opens you up to the opportunity for RAVING ADVOCATES – those people who are so thrilled with what you have done, who connect with your work, who feel compelled to let you know how you stepping out of your comfort zone has inspired them. Those raving advocates will trump any negative Nelly any day – so take a risk and do something you’ve been scared to try.
Leave a comment: What are the actions, whether personal, business, or professional that you are scared to take?
Announcement:
Over the next two weeks the #GrowthZone has a contest to give away two copies of Natalie MacNeil’s “The Conquer Kit”. This book is how I plan my business, and is a fantastic resource to help you if you have a business or are thinking of starting one. There are two ways to enter:
- If you are already a Mind Set #GrowthZone member all you need to do is either comment on this post or share it on your social media feed and you’ll be automatically entered.
- If you are not a #GrowthZone mailing list member now is the time. The Mind Set #GrowthZone gives you notifications every time there is a new post, plus additional access to resources to support you with your personal and professional growth. Join the #GrowthZone mailing list between January 13 and 27 and you will automatically be entered in the draw for this great book.
The draw for “The Conquer Kit” books will happen on January 28th. Thanks for hanging out in the #GrowthZone!
The idea of doing something new or different can cripple a person with fear – fear of the unfamiliar, unknown!!! Ugly self-doubt, a frightful case of the “what ifs” and, of course, those naysayers rear their ugly heads. Well, what if what you do is awesome??? Consider Christy’s advice to identify your motivation and why it’s important to you. This will help you summon the courage to step outside of your comfort – creating the possibility of enjoying, even loving that new, and unfamiliar thing. And even if you don’t love it, or it doesn’t work out, the self-challenge to take that step, that alone forces beneficial growth and self-improvement. Take Christy’s advice – take a risk and do something you’ve been scared to try. You’d be surprised at how empowering it can be!
Thanks Adina! You are so right, the simple act of doing to allow for growth and self-improvement is important and empowering!
I grew up not ever really hearing things like, “You can do it!” or “Go ahead, try something new! Take a risk!” So when I first started to do just that- be willing to step out of my comfort zone and take a risk- move to another country, try acupuncture, take yoga training, quit a job that had security to move somewhere else- it was something that I got more, “Why would you do that?!” than “Wow! Good luck!” from my family. I’ve been able to ignore their voices or rather silence those voices that are always in my head. But every once in a while, I hear it. One action that I have been hesitant to complete is applying for grad school. However, the Universe works in mysterious ways and hopefully, by the end of June, that will no longer be the case!
You can do it! Such a thrilling goal and if anyone hasn’t said it lately – you’ve got this!